Ahhh.. This is what every pooper dreams of..

The Neorest Pooping Throne

The Neorest 600

The lid automatically opens when you approach it, the seat warmer keeps your poop flaps cozy, and when you’re done, it shoots your privates with an “oscillating spray massage” before drying you off with a jet of hot air right up your corn hole. Nothing like an ass-warming, ass-emptying, ass-washing, ass-massaging, ass-drying, air-purifying, no-touch toilet.

And you don’t even have to buy it dinner first. But then again, I suppose you are buying it dinner…. hmmmmmmm